Year 3 Semester 1 - What has become of me?

Time flashes pass so ever quickly, just like the mathematical equations that "insane" scientist conjured up. They can derive all sorts of measurements from area dimensions to speed and time and space, since they are so smart, how come no one yet able to measure happiness?

Blink of an eye, I forge onwards the 3rd year of my University journey ... looking back in my 3 years of poly days, everything feels so transient. What had I done during my younger academic years? Only some will know, little will remember and nobody cares. Looking back at nonchalent and carefree times, was I happier then?

Alike the Titanic, the maiden voyage of love sunk many dreams and shook the world just like how mine was affected. Not all is lost, from it, slowly gathered back a new me, bestowed with strengths and virtues I never had. Even after the subsequent loss of another love, I guess the immunity kicked in ... till now, I still dun know why but does it matter?

The semester feels rather lighter frm previous initial ones. At least the 3 years spent havent really went the drain ... I miss the lectures, the atmosphere, the laughters, my KFC tutorial group, my girl (love, hate, reminisce, whatever). As of now, without the hectic schedules, theres a sense of emptiness as though I have too much time on hand.... For those who know me, I am not the studious type but I dun realli like rotting away at home too.

Too much time on hand, duno where to spend. There were initial thoughts of getting involved in some ECA but whenever I am reminded that I am supposed to "WAYANG" just like how I hate to when in green, the urge just diminish. Like a typical hormone raging teen, when lonliness kiks in, he seeks for companionship. Just like fiction and comedies, I had my fair share of the see-saw events where reliving the moments can literally jerk tears (joy or sorrow, I dun know).

Once potrayed as passionate, patriotic and prancing currently laid back, lazy and loathing. A person alias "Spears" commented once that blogs should write about the happy things. I wonder why I am the direct inverse? Too much time, no where to spend? Have to go out and expose myself more to the world?

To be the majority, you gotta participate in their activities
Staying with the minority, you will gain only sympathy
How about feeling happy? Do we have wear thy masks?
For my heart belongs to nobody, not now, not then, till ashes to dust